And again......

I won't lie, things have been pretty grim recently. Had several more rows with Joel over stupid, stupid little House things - including a MASSIVE one last night, featuring sobbing, storming out at 11pm, the works. Being the beginning of my "Star week" sure didn't help. Still, we both apologised and resolved to both be more mature, patient and chilled out. Well, after I drew a cute "I'm sorry" card and hand-delivered it to his office today.

But I'm digressing. I meant that things have also been grim on the SlimmingWorld front.

Having taken a 2 week sabbatical to focus on the House (Mum's suggestion), I'm wondering if it's the right thing to do. I've been told you're allowed up to 6 weeks holiday per year, and that's exactly how I've been treating it - a holiday. I'm eating chocolate again, we've had pizzas, crisps, you name it. Of course they're Asda Smartprice crisps (being that we sacrificed proper food for a carpetted bedroom) but still probably count as Syns. With no more manual labour I can't cling onto that bit of hope - and the 8-minute walk up the hill every morning isn't even feeling like a challenge anymore. I was given a bottle of Rose as a housewarming present, which I've already polished off, and I've had to skip tonight's Group as well, as I can't afford them until Thursday. I won't lie, I'm not exactly too focused at the moment.

The words "comfort food" spring to mind - something I've been eating in SPADES recently. It doesn't help that I've done virtually NO exercise either - Joel's been WAY too tired for sex recently, and I've even stopped doing my Pitbull-themed bedroom dance sessions at night. Our evenings are consigned to slumping in front of the telly, and scoffing. I hate myself for it, I really do. But we're too skint to afford proper food, and I don't have either the time, energy or brain-power to come up with delicious, healthy, cheap meals we'll both enjoy. OK, that's a lie, I probably DO have the time, but for the most part, I can't be rammed.

It's clearly some kind of mental slump I'm in at the moment - I'm determined to claw my way out starting by going to Group next week...... but things can't go on like this. Either I'll dig my bike out and start cycling again, or go on walks with Joel. I don't know. ANYTHING.

Speaking of Him Indoors, after we made up outside his office this lunchtime, he took it even further this evening by whisking me off to TGI Friday's for a surprise meal! Felt a pang of guilt at missing class for this, especially since it felt like a much more fun - but maybe not entirely BETTER - use of my time. I mean, better for ME because I enjoyed it, but not for the DIET. Oh, you know what I mean.